[STARTS WITH PETEY IN CAT JAIL READING THE NEWS, HE RIPS THE NEWSPAPER IN HALF]
Big Jim: Wow, you must really hate Speakbox’s writing do you?
Petey: Well I do but also I don’t get it! I am probably the second most intelligent person in this town, yet I get beaten by a dog who has half of my intelligence.
Big Jim: Well I was just going to say that IT IS MY BIRTHDAY!
Fluffy: Today is Big Jim’s birthday?
Mr. Whiskers: Respect!
[EVERYONE SINGS HAPPY BIRTHDAY OUTSIDE IN THE COURTYARD]
Petey: Okay so now can I-
Big Jim: Well here is a balloon!
[PETEY STARTS FLYING BECAUSE OF THE BALOON]
Petey: HAHA! I HAVE ESCAPED! SEE YEAH SUCKAS!
Mr. Whiskers: That guy does not earn my respect.
[CUTS TO PETEY GOING BACK TO HIS LAB]
Petey: Ah, this feels so good. But Dogman is too intelligent. BUT HOW!
[A BOOK FALLS ON PETEY’S HEAD]
Petey: Hmm, Dogman reads a lot of books. Romance novels are his favourite for some reason. But I know what to do: ERASE ALL WORDS EVER! But again, HOW!
[HE NOTICES THE POWER CORE FROM HIS FAILED TIME MACHINE IS CAUSING A PENCIL TO GLITCH]
Petey: Well, that pencil may work. Just got to add this to a gun and VOLLA! The Word-Be-Gone-2000! It can erase all words. Now let me just hop into this toy plane I stole from some stupid preschoolers and fly around the world!
[A MONTAGE OF PETEY ERASING WORDS AROUND THE WORLD, THEN IT CUTS TO A.R.F.G.U.S AGENTS IN THEIR BREAK ROOM]
T-Rex 1: And I was like, Arf? What do you want from me Gus?
T-Rex 2: HaHa very funny!
[A MASSIVE PHYSCOKINETIC WAVE HITS ALL THE MEMBERS]
T-Rex 3: Duh there is a hole?
T-Rex 1: Lets put a square in the circle hole!
T-Rex 2: Good Idea Rex!
T-Rex 4: You too T!
[THEY ALL TRY TO SHOVE A SQUARE TUBE INTO A CIRCLE HOLE]
T-Rex 1: Hey why isn’t it working?
T-Rex 4: I don’t know!
[ALL START CRYING]
Mason Yale: Mayor, I think we have a problem.
Mayor: Explain!
Mason Yale: Well if we keep the T-Rex corps in here, they will destroy this place.
Mayor: So what do we do?
Mason Yale: Let’s send them out on a “mission”
[A SPEAKER SOON COMES DOWN TO THE CRYING T-REX CORPS MEMBERS]
Mason Yale: *On Speaker* Oh T-Rex’s, go out and stop crime, I’ll give you cookies!
T-Rex 1: COOKIES!!!!!
T-Rex members: GIVE US COOKIES! *As they run out of Mt A.R.F.G.U.S*
Mason Yale: See, got them out!
Mayor: Yeah but how are they?
Mason Yale: Let’s see!
[CUTS TO MASON CHECKING HOW THE T-REX CORPS ARE DOING, BUT THEY ARE DESTROYING THE CITY, BURNING BUILDINGS, AND THROWING CARS OF RAMPS]
Mason Yale: Okay maybe it didn’t work, but I know who can stop them!
Mayor: And who is that?
Mason Yale: Dogman!
[CHIEF GETS A CALL FROM MASON YALE]
Chief: What is it froggy?
Mason Yale: *On phone* Our T-Rex Corps has gone insane and are destroying their city. Can you send out Dogman or someone to send them to jail?
Chief: Sure I’ll ask Dogman to find out who is destroying the city!
Mason Yale: *On phone* That’s not what I asked you to do!
Chief: Bye Bye!
Mason Yale: Well, even when our most powerful workers are destroying the city and the police force may be incredibly dumb, but I think we will be alright!
Mayor: Are you sure about that?
[CUTS TO DOGMAN IN CHIEF’S OFFICE]
Chief: Alright Dogman, You have to find out who has been destroying the city! If you don’t I will arrest you for being a, uhhh Dog?
Dogman: RUFF!!!
Chief: DOGMAN IS GO!!!!
Cop: You know that doesn’t make sense right?
Chief: Yeah but I like it! You want to go to Liopania?
Cop: Okay let’s go!
[CUTS TO PETEY TAKING A STROLL OUTSIDE HIS LAB, HAVING FUN AND ENJOYING HIS LIFE]
Petey: Ahhh! This is peak, I have no cops trying to stop me, I walk really nice, I talk really nice, I HAVE EVERYTHING! Now I could get a new car.
[PETEY GOES TO A CAR DEALERSHIP, WHERE HE FINDS A 1973 FORD PINTO]
Petey: Well, surprised this car is even here.
Car Dealership Guy 1: Well hello there Froggie!
Petey: Can I drive the car?
Car Dealership Guy 2: NOPE, you need to fill it up with gas!
Petey: Wouldn’t it have ga-HOLY HOLE IN THE WALL WHY IS GAS IN THE CAR?
[THE CAR IS COMPLETELY FILLED WITH GAS, THE CAR DEALERSHIP GUYS INSIDE IT]
Car Dealership Guy 1: Hey this car is pretty nice and safe.
Car Dealership Guy 2: Want a cigar?
Car Dealership Guy 1: YES!
[THEY LIT A CIGAR, CAUSING THE CAR TO EXPLODE AND STARTLE PETEY]
Petey: Okay?
[CUTS TO DOGMAN, IN HIS HOUSE]
Dogman: BARK! while *holding a microphone to a chair*
Dogman: *Growls, as the chair does nothing*
Dogman: BARK BARK BARK *Grabs the chair by its legs and throws it out the window, hitting a T-Rex*
T-Rex 2: Gee, that wasn’t nice. I was trying to destroy property, WAAAAA!!!!
Dogman: Hmm *thinking of who could have done the crimes, before getting an idea*
[CUTS TO DOGMAN LIE DETECTING PEE]
Dogman: Ruff.
[THE PEE SAYS NOTHING]
Dogman: *Checks if it’s true, it says it’s not and it electrocutes the Pee* RUFF!!
[THE PEE STILL SAYS NOTHING]
Dogman: BARK BARK! *Growls and spills the pee, causing him to get electrocuted and whimpers*
[CUTS TO PETEY AT THE DONUT STORE]
Petey: Hey there Dippy. You know the drill, give me twelve donuts!
Dippy: Sorry, we only sell bagels!
Petey: Okay give me twelve bagels.
Dippy: Sorry, we only sell them in dozens.
Petey: Dozen means twelve.
Dippy: No it doesn’t.
Petey: Give me a dozen bagels then.
Dippy: Sorry, we only sell donuts.
Petey: THEN GIVE ME A DOZEN DONUTS!
Dippy: Sorry we only sell them in two batches of six.
Petey: THEN GIVE ME TWO BATCHES OF SIX DONUTS.
Dippy: Sorry we only sell donuts in four batches of three.
Petey: THEN GIVE ME FOUR BATCHES OF THREE DONUTS!
[PETEY CONTINUES YELLING AT DIPPY, VICTOR LOOKING OUT]
Victor: His acting is immaculate, hard to believe he wants cupcakes.
Petey: I DON’T CARE JUST GIVE ME DONUTS, I WANT TWELVE DONUTS, DONUTS!!!!!
Dippy: Gee you don’t have to be so mean, I work so hard and yet you yell at me???
Petey: Sorry.
Dippy: *pulls out bag of bagels and gives it to Petey* Here are twelve patches of bagels froggie!
[PETEY LEAVES AND THROWS THE BAGELS TO VICTOR]
[CUTS TO DOGMAN OUTSIDE, GIVING A TRAFFIC CONE A TICKET, WHILE BEING THE MIDDLE OF A SNOWY AREA WHERE TRAFFIC HAS BEEN BLOCKED OFF]
Dogman: *Growls* Ruff!
[DOGMAN GOES UP TO A SNOWMAN AND PEES ON IT, WITH THE SNOWMAN NOTICING]
Snowman: Hey why are you doing that?
Dogman: Ruff?
Snowman: Yes I’m alive, why are you even here giving speeding tickets to things that can’t drive in a dead winter area?
Dogman: BARK BARK! (Trying to explain his mission)
Snowman: I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT! Us Snowmen have been the target of the sun and you guys for way too long, we will get our revenge. SNOWMEN ATTACK!
Dogman: *PULLS OUT A PISTOL AND A GATTLING GUN OF ROCKS, THEN GROWLS*
Snowman 3: ATTACK!!!
Snowman 2: Deploying units.
Snowman 7: Throwing knife!
Dogman: *chomps on knife* BARK! *shoots the snowman*
Snowman 4: SNOWMAN DOWN SNOWMAN DOWN!!!
Snowman Leader: Well, we have to prepare for the gatling gun!
Snowman 4: What do you mean by Gatling GUN!!!!
*Dogman guns down the snowmen with the gatling gun*
Snowman Leader: Thank you for your use as a shield!
Snowman 6: Well I’m from the behind and Snowman 5 has already fallen off the snowhill the target is on, but I can stand off against this DogMAN!!
*Gets blasted by the pulse ball from the pistol*
Snowman leader: Damn it, we need to find another way!
[CUTS TO TWO T-REX’S WATCHING THE EVENT UNFOLD]
T-Rex 5: Should we go stop the Dog?
T-Rex 1: Of course, if we do, the speaker guy will give us cookies!
T-Rex 5 and 1: *In Unison* WE LOVE COOKIES!
[CUTS TO DOGMAN AND THE SNOWMAN LEADER]
Snowman Leader: This town isn’t big enough for the two o-*Gets shot by the gatling gun*
Dogman: RUFF!!
T-Rex 1: NOPE NOPE YOU ARE BEING ARRESTED!
Dogman: Ruff? BARK!
T-Rex 5: Because you are a Dog!
Dogman: *Whimpers before going to jail*
[CUTS TO PETEY BEING PISSED OUTSIDE]
Petey: Rats! I should have only made Dogman dumb, now I can’t do anything! The TV is dumb!
[PETEY WATCHES A TV SHOW]
Duperman: Duh, me a punkrocker.
Lax Ludwig Von: NOOOOO!!!
Petey: THE SPORTS ARE DUMB!
Sports player 1: KICK THE BALL AND GET THREE DOINTS!
[THE BALL GETS KICKED]
Sports player 2: I WIN!
Referee: YOU’RE WINNER!
Petey: AND THE TOILET IS DUMB!
[PETEY IS AT THE GRAVEYARD AND SEES OFFICER KNIGHT’S GRAVE]
Petey: Rest in lego pieces Officer Knife? COME ON! IF I SEE ONE MORE DUMB THING I WILL GO INSANE!
[A HORSE IS DRIVING A CAR WHILE A MAN IS PULLING IT]
Petey: COME ON!
[PETEY RUNS TO HIS LAB TO READ BOOKS TO STAY SANE]
[CUTS TO DOGMAN IN JAIL]
Dogman: BARK BARK BARK!!!
Victor: This is Victor Quartz reporting outside of the Jail, in which Catboy got arrested for being a Dog! I can’t believe that happened! In other news I have a criminal record including multiple counts of first degree murder!
T-Rex 2: Hey look it’s a doggie!
T-Rex 3: Yeah lets pat it!
Dogman: *Growls*
T-Rex 4: He looks so-*Get bitten by Dogman* HE BIT MY HAND, WAAAAA!!!!
T-Rex 6: HEY WHY DID YOU BITE HIM, ATTACK!!
T-Rex 2: YEAH WHATEVER HE SAID!
[THE T-REX’S START TO ATTACK DOGMAN]
Dogman: *Whimpers and notices a stuffed bunny* RUFF RUFF!
T-Rex 3: Hey, a bunny!
T-Rex 6: NO IT’S MINE!
T-Rex 2: NOPE IT’S MINE!
T-Rex 3: GIVE ME THE BUNNY!
[THE T-REX’S FIGHT OVER IT AND BREAK A WALL THROUGH THE JAIL]
Dogman: *Confused* Bark! *Smells Petey* RUFF? *goes to his lab*
[DOGMAN WALKS UPSTAIRS AND SEES PETEY READING BOOKS, NOW CHUBBY AND HAVING LET HIMSELF GO]
Dogman: BARK BARK!
Petey: DOGMAN?
[DOGMAN TAKES THE BOOKS AND RUNS AWAY]
Petey: HEY THOSE ARE MINE!
[CUTS TO SCHOOL]
Teacher: And now that's how Beetlejuice is a sun and gas and not a Uranus!
Dogman: *burst open the door* RUFF RUFF! *Throws books at kids*
Kids: *Read books and become smart* THANK YOU DOGMAN!
Petey: COME ON, I WAS REALLY INVESTED IN THAT ROMANCE NOVEL, PLUS YOU DON’T STEAL FROM ME!
[THE BELL RINGS, CAUSING ALL THE KIDS TO RUN OUTSIDE AND TRAMPLE PETEY]
Petey: Ouch, well it’s time to get those books. SHOW TUNE ROBOTS, the narrator is too dumb, you do the Flip O Rama.
Show Tune Robots 1,2,3,4: *In Unison* OOOOOKKKKKAAAYYY!
Show Tune Robot 2,3,4: DO WA SHO WA, THIS IS PRESENTING IN FLIP O RAMA!
Show Tune Robot 1: There is Petey and he is being crushed!
Show Tune Robot 2,3,4: HE IS BEING CRUSHED!
Show Tune Robot: Now the swings are KICKING HIM!
Show Tune Robots 1,2,3,4: *In Unison* HE IS GETTING DESTROYED BY THE SPRINGS AND THE SLIDE, LIKE THAT ROBOT CHIEF! HE IS BEATEN TO A PULP AND NOW THE DOG IS RUNNING TO KILL US. WE ARE ABSOLUTELY SUPER!
[DOGMAN BEATS THEM UP AND TAP DANCES]
Show Tune Robots 1: I am f-*gets punched and dies*
Dogman: Ruff! *handcuffs Petey*
Petey: RATS!
[EVERYONE CHEERS, DOGMAN FINDS THE PENCIL IN PETEY’S POCKET, REVERSING THE EFFECTS]
T-Rex’s: THANK YOU DOGMAN!
Victor; THANKS DOGGIE!
Dippy: *Still Dumb* THANKS FROGGIE!
[DOGMAN GOES IN THE PLANE AND MAKES EVERYONE GOOD, CUTS TO PETEY IN HIS HOSPITAL]
Petey: Well the bill is only 2 dollars *reads more* Wait? ALL MY CRIMES ADD UP TO 200000? HOW AM I GOING TO AFFORD THAT?
[PETEY IS CRUSHED AND GOES BACK ON HIS LAPTOP TO PLAY CLUB PENGUIN]
Petey: Well one thing is certain, I am such a good villa-*gets randomly teleported, leaving behind an influx of physcokinetic energy*
[CUTS TO DOGMAN READING A ROMANCE NOVEL AT HIS DESK, WHISTLING AT THE RISKAY PARTS]
[CUTS TO CREDITS]
[START OF POST CREDIT SCENE]
Chief: Where are we?
Cop: We are in the country of Liopania.
Chief: That’s not even a country!
Cop: Well, this is going to be a long way home.
[SHOW THEM BEING STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN]
[END OF POST CREDIT SCENE]
[END OF EPISODE]